I feel like I'm finally starting to figure everything out.
As the days go on, I'm beginning to discover more and more of myself. I'm sorting out my feelings, figuring out what my limits are, and realizing what's important to me in the long run, versus the things that only make me feel good in the short term.
Probably most importantly, I'm learning what it means to be me. Just me. I'm figuring out what makes me happy, and I'm learning to live with myself. You know how they always say you must be able to love yourself before you can love others? I always thought it sounded a bit corny, but the more time I spend really growing as a person, the more I realize how true it is.
It's late and I've got a lot of work to do, so I'm going to be lazy and steal a metaphor from a Death Cab for Cutie song:
It's as though I was standing on a frozen lake and pretending it was solid ground. But as time went on the ice grew thin, and eventually I just fell through. These past few months I've sort of been struggling just to keep my head above water... and now I've taught myself how to swim, and I'm slowly working my way toward the shore. And hopefully in the coming months I'll have come to a more solid foundation to stand on.
Okay, I'll stop with the corny analogies for now.
My point is, things are really looking up. And who knows, maybe future me will be able to make up for some of the not-so-great decisions that past me made.
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