More of the same.

I had sort of a big lack of self esteem moment today. It happens sometimes.

Naturally, I put on a pretty dress and pretended I was somebody else for the day. I even managed to make the guy at Cup o' Joe laugh at a joke that I'm normally not funny enough (or outgoing enough) to make.

When I got home, I nearly slapped myself. Why? Because I am funny enough and (sometimes) outgoing enough to make people laugh. How do I know? Because I did it. And I've done it before, and I'll do it again. And after that silly realization, I sat down and wrote this:

Alright, so I might not be one of the prettier girls, but I still have a bunch of guys chasing after me. So I must be doing something right, right? And I might not be a stand up comedian, but you don't have to be to make people laugh. I might not be part of the acting crowd, but I'm not an actor and I don't want to be. I'm a writer. And a damn good one at that. 

Yeah, I didn't go to Harvard or Yale or Columbia or NYU. But I could have if I hadn't settled for OSU in the name of love! But you know what? I don't regret ending up here. If I'd gone to one of those schools I probably wouldn't've ever ended up in theatre. And hey, it doesn't really matter what school I go to... either way, I'm going to end up in L.A. busting my ass in an agency mailroom until I get a foot in the door anyway.

And you know what? I'm really fucking smart. My IQ was tested by two different schools when I was younger, and both scores came out around 155. That's 15 points above genius. I skipped the sixth grade. I took all college courses -- and got all A's-- my senior year of high school. I can read most people like books. My memory is fantastic. My ability to learn new things is fantastic. I'm fantastic.

I came from nothing. From a poor, broken, single parent family. I've been in situations you only ever read about or see in movies or on Oprah. And look where I am now! Look what I've accomplished!

And twenty years from now, when I'm a full fledged screenwriter/director/producer and I look back on today, I'm going to laugh. Because I know that I am smart and funny and talented and at least semi-attractive. And I'm kind, and I'm insightful, and I'm open minded. And yeah, I'm kind of an asshole sometimes. But let's be real, who isn't kind of an asshole sometimes?

So here's a big old fuck you to anyone who has ever thought that I'm not good enough. Because I am.